365: Social Distancing

2020 was a year no one expected. In the days before lockdown began, I was in shock as the world around me seemed calm and quiet. Some days stand out, yet others fade together, as in my mind they have been blended with emotions of confusion and disbelief. On March 12th, I walked in the rain from a train, as I commuted from Queens to Brooklyn. I was headed to my newest and third part-time job, for a training session. As I walked my usual route, I was comforted by the sounds of children playing, as they were still in school. This made things feel a bit normal despite what was happening in the outside world. I was aware of COVID-19, yet at the time I didn’t have a T.V, I obtained most of my knowledge from social media. Therefore, I didn’t know the full extent of the chaos. The night before, on Wednesday, March 11th, I was in utter shock, as COVID-19 impacted my main part-time job. The seriousness of the virus became real, when my place of work could no longer host large events.

Upon arriving to my newest position, it was a bit of a ghost town, as there was maybe one visitor present. At this point in time, I wasn’t afraid of catching the virus. I was more concerned about working because reality started to set in, as I knew that I could no longer work in public places if restrictions on large gatherings were put in place. So I went to work for a quick training session that was still scheduled despite unknown impending doom. After my training session, I then went to Target to stock up on non-perishables, just the week before I hadn’t had such concerns. But hearing rumors of what was to come, I knew that it was best for me to begin gathering non-perishable items, for at the time, I believed that the grocery stores would close, and I didn’t want to be without food. With a calm demeanor and confidence, at Target, I got what I needed, which was enough to be carried from Brooklyn to Queens in a book bag. I began taking things seriously as the world was quickly beginning to shift.

On March 13th, went back to my newest and third part-time position. I wasn’t called off of work, so I presumed that I still had to come in to work my shift. Much like the day before, my place of work was completely empty; as I’m sure our usual guests began sheltering in place. Without work to do, a co-worker and I sat together mostly talking about a wide range of topics, while loosely planning outdoor activities for guests to enjoy once things with COVID, calmed down. I was only scheduled to work four hours that day, but without much to do four hours felt like a lifetime. Yet again, I went due to the fact that I didn’t know when I would be able to work again, so my goal was to make money while still possible. At one point, another co-worker came into the room, and began telling us a story of how sometimes remaining calm and staying in one place isn’t the best option, when things are bad evacuate. Present day, this story speaks volumes. Anyhow, once finished with work I went shopping at Target like the day before, and picked up a few more items, and then went home surprisingly to prepare for a date.

My date and I met at a Starbucks, mask-less. We sat at a table and chatted, not really knowing how much danger was looming. I became a bit distracted when an officer walked into the Starbucks. His presence somehow frightened me, in the context of what was already happening with the virus. The officer smiled and winked, yet I’m sure my face was blank and stone faced as I was on edge. Anyhow, I never heard back from my date. Granted we both had other major concerns to tend to, yet sometimes, I wonder if that person ever thinks about how crazy it was that we went on a date before the our worlds came to a stop.

By March 14th, 2020, my shift with my main part-time position was cancelled, thus I ventured out into the world without a mask to grab personal care items at my local Dollar General. At this point in time, masks weren’t mandatory. I noted that this would be my last trip outside, as without work I was planning to shelter-in-place. While out, I decided to get a thermometer, if I were to get sick, I at least wanted to be able to take my temperature. To my surprise, other folks had the same idea, for there weren’t any thermometers at any of the drug stores that I visited. Thus, I walked home, in the early spring warmth starting to wonder if I was coming down with a fever. I then decided that only time would tell. After going into my apartment, I most likely got comfortable with the idea that I was no longer going to be venturing out to the store unless absolutely necessary.

I started distancing on March 15th and by March 17th, I had a plan. Since I was stuck in the house, I decided to photograph my immediate home environment. Not only that, but I would share my work on social media, as a way to get my work seen. Thus, my goal became to take one photo a day of a scene or object within my home environment. Knowing that I couldn’t easily access outside environments, I wanted my photos to really show my “new normal” of living under restrictions. Alone each photo doesn’t tell a complete story, but together the common thread between them is that these photos were taken during the first year of the pandemic from March 2020-March 2021. I didn’t know when the pandemic would end. I considered ending my project, once various restrictions on certain businesses were lifted. Yet, I decided to continue once my roommate reminded me that the pandemic wasn’t over. Therefore, I decided to stop at a year.

Early on in the series, there is emotional depth in my photos as they really capture what it was like for me emotionally during the early days of the pandemic. A lot of my earlier photos are darker in tone, and were captured in low light conditions. Reflecting on these choices, they seem to depict sadness. While at the time, I was more confused by what was happening and what it meant for my life moving forward. Towards the end of the project, the effort put into my photos wasn’t as great, simply put; I was tired of capturing the mundane. Although at times, my imagination and my ability to see beauty in the ordinary is present, in some of the photos I took later in the first year of the pandemic. Overall, I enjoyed being creative, and I am proud that I was brave enough to share my work even when my photos were mundane. What I’ve learned is that, I’m an artist. After, two full days of sheltering in place, my first response was to create. With more free time, I jumped on my creative urges and began to express and explore my home environment. After-all it wasn’t safe to be outside. Thus, a year later I am proud of my commitment to this project and my ability to see myself as an artist. During a scary and confusing time period, my creativity and curiosity surged. Without realizing it, through my photos I expressed feelings of sadness, confusion and boredom. Overall, I am grateful to my family, friends and roommates and anyone else whom watched me during the process of sharing my photos. Thank you for watching.

To find the full project, visit my lnstagram page, @lightsey_alexis.